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To use an analogy, think of skiing. To learn how to ski we often fall, which is painful. Falling makes us learn how to ski better, but wanting to fall does not make for a better skier. The purpose is to learn how to ski masterfully without falling. When we're not falling anymore, it means we have learned. When we can lead our life so that we do not make ourselves suffer, we have mastered the art of living.
That does not mean that there will no longer be mistakes and errors that might cause some pain. When we become expert at skiing, we may start challenging more difficult slopes, maybe even to the extreme. Then, pain and suffering may again be experienced in trying to achieve a more demanding goal that we have set for ourselves.
To live a life where we experience pain and suffering daily may mean that we are making regular errors in judgment. Whereas to live so that we do not encounter pain at all may mean that we are not challenging ourselves to the utmost. It is a fine line. A matter of balance.
Self-improvement can also cause pain. "No Pain, No Gain" is a masochistic way of achieving goals, but it's easy to see how this kind of thinking came about.
Exercising can be painful, especially when we are pushing ourselves beyond our comfort zone. To acquire knowledge is often painful; studying and researching long hours is a pain. So is finding out a well-kept secret about yourself or someone you love. Pain can be involved when trying to improve in any endeavor, physical, intellectual or emotional. But there is also pain in not improving or staying ignorant. How painful it is to be at a standstill when everyone else is progressing!
Therefore, pain can happen when there is resistance between where you are and where you're going to. From ignorance to knowledge, illness to health, from discomfort to comfort, from stasis to movement, all involves some pain.
So, can one improve without pain? I say, yes. Gradual improvement over time is painless and often pleasurable. I would go so far as to say that gradual improvement is more beneficial in that it is long lasting and is more quality oriented. It is trying to improve too quickly, or gaining too much knowledge too rapidly that produces pain.
Patience and faith is necessary. Relax, and persevere.
Fear
Fear is the thought of the wolf at the door. The actual threat may or may not be an illusion. That is why fear is so fearsome. We can never know if the danger we face is real or imaginary. Sometimes fear is helpful, sometimes it is not. Fear is based on uncertainty.
Fear.
Fear can be found anywhere, for it is an illusion.
With it, we are frozen.
Without it, we are dangerous.
It moves us.
We move it.
Laugh at fear.
And fear laughs back.
With no humor.
The best way and the spiritual way to respond to it is by being certain. By connecting to the source of absolute certainty within.
The two biologically wired methods to deal with fear is to hide from it or face it and kill it. The fight or flight response. Both animals and humans have it. Even animals have courage. But humans can go further if we choose to. As we evolve more spiritually there is another way. We can tap into the higher spiritual agencies and use fear to our advantage. It's like aikido or judo. Instead of directly opposing force with force like boxing or wrestling, aikido and judo uses the opponent's force on itself.
The problem of fighting fear tooth and nail, force against force, is that violence begets more violence. One may kill the wolf, but the blood draws more wolves (so to speak) and it keeps on going. The world trend of war and more wars is a good example.
How else can we deal with fear, besides fighting it or hiding from it? By taming it. By turning it into a dog, a watchdog. The fear is still there but it is no longer something to be afraid of. The fear of fear dissipates. Because of our heredity, as long as we inhabit our human bodies, the electro-chemical response of fear will be a part of us. Even when we evolve from using the spiritual circuit of courage that gives us courage of the flesh and we tap into spiritual courage, we are still dealing with fear. After all, as many people have noted before, courage is not the absence of fear, but the ability to deal with it effectively, to even use it beneficially.
The best way to deal with fear, to overcome it and to even use it, is to relax. The technique of using the qi reflects this well. Fear makes one tense. The body goes rigid preparing for the impending crisis and this weakens us. Strength comes from relaxing and by tapping into the qi, the universal divine energy. We have to be able to relax to tap into this energy, just like worshipful meditation. And when we can do this well, we are flowing with qi, and fear cannot have a hold on us when we are relaxed and in oneness with the universe. After all, fear is a separateness. It is anxiety about the safety of our body, this unit of matter, as opposed to being one with the entirety of the universe. When we are at one with the universe and God, fear has no effect on us. Fear is doubt of our own safety. And the opposite of doubt is faith. And faith is something we choose and is facilitated by relaxing.
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